I always felt something was missing.
I felt broken inside. I wanted to get better. I wanted to be that person. But I made bad choices and went to jail.
While there, I did a study called “The Purpose of Christmas” with Debbie O’Brien, who co-leads Celebrate Recovery at Blue Ridge. I had never really found a recovery group before because my struggles weren’t with alcohol or drugs. Then, I started doing Celebrate Recovery Inside.
Finally I found something that fit for me and the hurts, habits and hang-ups I have.
In the second or third class, Debbie played worship music to start. That’s usually what she did. But this time, she played “Amazing Grace” by Chris Tomlin. The words, “My chains are gone, I’ve been set free, My God, my Savior has ransomed me,” came over me. Something happened in my heart — that was the moment God took control of my life. I'd never felt more at peace.
That night, I learned that if He could forgive me, who am I to not forgive myself?
After that, I almost never missed a class. I became a devout Bible reader.
Jail was not easy, but that’s where my life changed. I knew I had to keep up with CR after leaving jail. I know people say they want to go to Celebrate Recovery after getting out of jail, but they don't. Then, they wind up back in jail.
I didn’t want to be that statistic.
I know with God and CR, I won't make those bad choices.
I got out June 9, and I went to CR June 12. I was hesitant to tell people I had just gotten out of jail. But I did. I even asked for prayer for a place to live, because I was staying in a hotel. The next day I got a call about a place to live.
You have no idea the friends I've made, the compassion I've felt, the lack of judgment.
I now have a job, a place to live and a car to drive. As soon as I get back on my feet financially, I want to give back. I want to become part of CR's team.
I want to be that person who someone can say, if she can do it I can too.
Learn more about Celebrate Recovery here.