When Katherine Jarvis’ husband died unexpectedly from a brain aneurysm two years ago, she lost the man who, after 36 years of marriage, could finish her sentences.

“When it happens, you are so numb you can't think,” she said. “It was the hardest thing I've had to deal with.”

Katherine was recovering from shoulder surgery when she learned that her husband, age 57, was taken to the ER. When she arrived, she could hardly make sense of what the doctor was saying — that her husband was unresponsive when he arrived and had passed away.

“Losing my husband was a different level of grief,” Katherine said. “Not only was he my husband, he was my friend. We did everything together.”

The couple, who had three children and four grandchildren together, met when they were young and were quickly married. Katherine didn’t remember adult life without him.

Little by little, God began to reveal His provision for her, even in this dark and difficult time. Katherine calls these bright spots in the darkness, God’s “little diamonds” to her:

  • That her husband wasn’t driving when it happened.

  • That she was out on medical leave so she had more time off before going back to work.

  • That her physical therapist, who had lost his father, was a great listener and encourager.

  • That all her children were living in Virginia at the time.

Though she was thankful for these blessings, Katherine knew she needed something more. She attended the end of a GriefShare session at another church and found that it helped.

Katherine eventually started attending Blue Ridge. It was too difficult to return to her former church, so packed with memories of her husband and the friends they had shared. One of Katherine’s three adult children attended Blue Ridge with his family and she decided to give it a try. He also told her about Griefshare starting a new session at Blue Ridge in fall 2014.

“After that first year, I started coming out of fog,” she said. Katherine then started processing her grief and asking many “what if” questions. Coming to the sessions helped her to deal with those questions and to understand that everyone’s days are numbered by God. There’s nothing she could have done to have change what happened.

“Through GriefShare, I've learned that it's OK to be angry sometimes with God, but also to know He would never leave or forsake me. GriefShare has helped me grow closer to God, find my identity and learn how to take care of myself. ”

GriefShare also showed Katherine how to walk through holidays and anniversaries, which were especially difficult. She still attends when it is in session and misses it when it isn’t.

“ It was helpful to find others to share with, share in ways you might not share even with your family.”


You can sign up online for the next session of GriefShare starting September 10.