It is amazing how connected our world has become. We text before breakfast, at stop lights and before bed; update Facebook with photos from this afternoon’s hike or a status update about lines at Disney or even post a video to YouTube showing how our cat can lip-sync to a Justin Bieber tune (I am proud to say I have never done this).

We are connected. We share so much.

But what exactly do we share? All of the amazing stuff we just did, of course! Have you ever seen “My kids got straight C’s! Best. Kids. Evah!!” or “My hubby totally forgot our anniversary and instead quickly made a card from a napkin and crayons! I love him! Thanks, Snuggles!”?

We present the perfect stuff. And while we should celebrate special moments and people, it can create unrealistic images. Suddenly you find yourself thinking, “Man, the Joneses went hiking this Saturday! And all we did was laundry. Ho-hum.”

It even gets more dangerous when it comes to serious struggles: a less-than-satisfying marriage, kids who struggle, parents who struggle, existing in difficult financial circumstances, difficult jobs or just not feeling loved or even forgiven by God. We are less likely to share those things.

This makes us feel alone.

We are the ones who struggle. Obviously no one else does. Look at all of those perfect lives and families. We can share with close friends about serious struggles, but pride can keep us from ever admitting that we just don’t know what to do with this 4 year old or that teen.

Here’s what God is teaching me and my family: We are to live in community, celebrating amazing anniversary trips AND seeking support and help when our precious God-given little terror finally enters seventh grade, and inherits all the chaos that comes with that. Pride can be the biggest obstacle to true community.

So, here are some things to chew on:

  • No family is perfect. Think of all the things with which you struggle as parents and as a family but do not use a bull horn to advertise to the world. Yep, everyone else does the same thing. And you need their help. And they need yours.

  • Find parenting partners/mentors/ peers. And connect with others who are in similar stages in life. A relationship with others who can offer prayers, advice, resources and love when you need it is a gift from God.

  • Get in the Word with your new-found parenting survival buddies. Open the Bible. Pray together. Read together. Pray for each other’s children. And be sure to keep it all real.

— Randy Dunn